Mermaid Manicures


I appreciate that the only thing madder than a nonsensical film about a mermaid named Madison coming to New York City in a bad wig to fall in love with Tom Hanks is trying to reason with with a nonsensical film about a mermaid named Madison coming to New York City in a bad wig to fall in love with Tom Hanks. But seriously, take a look at this lunacy. Specifically around the 2.10-2.20 mark.


It was my friend Clare who reminded me of this outrage at the weekend. I believe that it out-crazies everything else about the film, particularly as it only serves to draw attention to the fact that Daryl Hannah is missing part of her left index finger. We all know this now, thanks to Kill Bill. But who was in the Splash production meeting when someone piped up with “I know, let’s give Madison some shimmer varnish. That we way we can both undermine the idea that she is a creature from under the sea, and flag up Daryl’s missing digit. Hmm’kay?’.

It’s stuff like this that keeps me up at night.


2 Responses to “Mermaid Manicures”

  1. 1 Clare Bennett

    I bought a similar colour to this YEARS later when I was about 19, having obsessed over it for years. It was Chanel and I was meant to give it to my sister in law as a present, but couldn’t resist trying it first on one thumb and the next thing was all ten nails had been painted and o dear, I had to keep the bottle for myself. I do remember specifically looking at my hand under the water whilst in the bath, but did not go so far as to actually throw a wallet in to open / remove on of my digits to go the whole Hannah.

  2. 2 Clare Bennett

    PS I am pretty sure it was called Chrystalline – I have been sitting at work going mad thinking “Clandestine…, that was a lipstick…..’and it suddenly came to me. Am now massively annoyed as I cannot find any reference to it on the net. Why doesn’t Chanel have a back catalogue for us to reference?

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